Jul 9, 2013
Folks, in just about half a year, we’ve grown from a small group of blogs to one of reddit’s fastest growing communities, reaching now 10,000 subscribers with no end in sight.
I wanted to take a moment to talk to you about what’s happening here, the social changes we’re witnessing, and some of the greater implications of this sub that even I was unaware of just months ago.
Originally this sub was about sexual strategy. A group of us realized that sex just ain’t what dad told us (or worse, it wasn’t what single mom told us). We were being told the wrong way to get sex (be beta), we were exploited for doing so, but we weren’t getting it – and for some, our marriages were falling apart.
So naturally we did what most men do when faced with a problem. We discussed it, how does one get sex? And we figured it out. Men invented game. We invented pickup. We discovered that acting the part of the beta wasn’t going to work anymore, and we wised up. We learned we can get sex .. the wrong way.
Sex has always been a big portion of what drives culture. Men want it, women have it. The reward of sex and family was enough to drive men to build our civilization as we know it. Behind every hard working coal miner was a man looking forward to providing for his wife and kids. Behind every man doing a dirty dangerous and grueling job was a man doing his part to keep society going, knowing this world would be here for his kids.
Over the past decade, a number of books, news reports, and articles have been published taking a look at men’s role in our society. “The end of men” and “men on strike” etc., all attempting to address the issues: Men aren’t getting married, men aren’t graduating, men aren’t getting careers, and men aren’t producing. Men aren’t doing their jobs to keep society functioning.
And here we were, discussing how to get sex for free. It’s almost as if we were trying to cheat society.
The books don’t all agree on what the causes of men’s social withdrawal are. But one thing they all agree on: The phenomenon everybody’s talking about, the subject of this crisis, the very people everybody is now worried about… they’re talking about us.
Surely, somebody was getting cheated. But, maybe it wasn’t society.
What we’ve discussed on The Red Pill isn’t just how to have sex; though that’s thoroughly covered. We’ve been discussing something that’s even more reviled by society at large: we’ve been discussing how to be happy. And we’ve been realizing that the path to happiness doesn’t really involve making the world a better place anymore. We’ve discovered that the path to happiness means focusing on ourselves – becoming selfish.
Enter the Puerarchy.
We are the Puerarchy. We do what makes us happy, and don’t give a fuck about anything else. And that scares everybody, because culture needs us, and the standard mechanism to control us — shame – isn’t working anymore. There are multiple subreddits, television shows, news reports and books attempting right now to shame us back into submission. They need us to overproduce. They need us to do dirty jobs. They need us to pay for children. They need us to make society go.
“Man up!” is their cry, “grow up and make honest women out of our career women. Stop being such man-children. Stop being Peter Pans! Do the right thing! Stop being immature, take on responsibilities, that’s how you become a man! Pay for these children! You knew the consequences of your manhood!”
But a man can only hear these things for so long before he asks, what’s in it for me?
And that’s when we reached a breaking point. There was no reward, there was only shame.
We discovered that marriage had transformed into a raw deal. Marriage vows became interchangeable with I’ll bet you half my money that you’ll love me forever. Watching our fathers, brothers, and friends deal with terrible divorces, contemplate suicide, and suffer at the hands of biased judges quickly sobered many men. And the women, why didn’t they seem like the sort our grandfathers were apt to marry? Attraction became a one-way street. Women had demands; men had whatever they could get. Even suggesting that a woman should attempt to become more attractive was an offense to the entire gender, as we were to quickly learn: any critique of a woman was woman-hating misogyny.
Women became masculine. Major cities across westernized countries showed bars full of women with terrible attitudes, bitch shields, and egos larger than that of a super-model only 50 years ago. If you didn’t like that, tough shit you misogynist! Remember: It’s oppressive to suggest a woman should attempt to cooperate or change anything about herself to impress others. You should like them as they are: fat, bitchy, annoying, and always right.
Our rights were dissolved. Being in the same room with a woman became a liability. Innocent until proven guilty was replaced with a woman’s false rape testimony.
Sex became possible enslavement. During an era where women gained unprecedented rights sans responsibility over their reproduction, men were shamed into retaining the responsibilities of reproduction, becoming helpless slaves to women. The redistribution of wealth from men in the form of child-support and in the form of welfare meant we were all becoming unwitting or unwilling fathers in the wallet department, but not fathers in the family department.
Whereas a man could be accused of rape if a man tampered with birth control, a woman could tamper with birth control as a career path, enslaving endless numbers of men with impunity.
Finding out that a child wasn’t yours after an elapsed amount of time wasn’t enough to get off the hook for paying for a child, even if you had no visitation rights.
Men were transforming from willing participants in a culture that demanded much from them but rewarded them for the trouble, into unwilling slaves in a culture that demanded responsibility but maintained they didn’t even need them.
But the ever present message of shame emanating from the loudspeaker of feminism lost its effectiveness. The constant buzzing of the shrieking and screeching women desensitized us to it, and all that was left was the realization that we were not happy.
Needless to say, we were lost. Our all-too-common single mothers or beta-dads were unable to address this to the new generations of boys. And with no fraternity, no sense of self could be found.
Things were wrong. And we finally noticed. We found each other and started to compare notes, and what we found was startling: our experiences were the same.
Despite the many ongoing attempts to try to shame us and tell us we’re wrong, our observations were clear, there was no way to go back from that. Sure our evidence was anecdotal, but when the cultural narrative maintains a counter position to you, it’s hard to find more than anecdotes.
Our word-of-mouth is exactly how the patriarchy has always worked before being dismantled. Conventional wisdom of life and love were always passed down from father-to-son. Fraternities were also an important social aspect to being a man that has all but been eradicated from our culture. Men-only spaces have been demonized and destroyed; paved over to make room for women’s studies classes and women’s centers. The ol’ boys club became a slur, and women petitioned to invite girls into the boy scouts.
As I’ve spent more time moderating this sub, I slowly came to realize that what was missing from my life was a sense of belonging among men. In fact, in my younger years, I had disliked even the idea of finding belonging among men. I never had the desire for male companionship, I didn’t speak the language, I didn’t understand of what value men could bring to my life.
And during this portion of my life, I had also never understood the feeling of belonging, of self-value, or of meaning. In fact, due to the cognitive dissonance of trying to resolve what I kept being told is reality, and what I observe (which was *actual* reality), my life was stressful, was depressing, full of disappointment, and full of failure. There was no meaning, no belonging. There was no place for me, just an empty realization that I do not connect with those around me, and the understanding that this was probably my fault — for being male.
“Rebuilding the patriarchy”
“Rebuilding the patriarchy” is a catch phrase of a few of us here use (softharem in particular), and it’s a fun sentiment. We are quickly growing into one of the world’s largest fraternities. Some of our older, more experienced men here are becoming surrogate fathers to the younger members. Brothers are helping brothers.
The patriarchy, which was disrupted by feminism, wasn’t an evil construct, it was a necessary construct. It was the passing of conventional wisdom from father to son. It was the construct of families and marriage to enable the building of our society, and the economic growth that enabled societies to prosper. The patriarchy was the load bearing pillar of our species.
But folks, we’re not rebuilding the patriarchy. Not in the way it once was. We are the puerarchy. The time of male sacrifice and disposability for reward of honor and family is long over, and at least for our time here on earth, it’s not coming back. I welcome the patriarchy 2.0: The puerarchy.
I believe Ian Ironwood may have coined the term “puerarchy” to describe more-or-less extended adolescence. It’s a complaint our mainstream media has levied among the males- in an attempt to drive us into performance via shame – where we once were motivated by social reward: man-children, boys, peter-pan syndrome, never manning-up, never growing-up, never taking on social responsibilities that denote manhood.
The irony of feminism is simple- they convinced men they aren’t necessary to the extent that they actually withdrew from society… and now they’re crying “where have all the good men gone?”
It turns out that society needed men to over-produce for their families, to keep the economy going. It turns out we needed men to join the army and protect our interests. It turns out we needed construction workers, sanitation workers, coal miners, truck drivers, and every other dirty, difficult, dangerous job.
But without the reward, we didn’t see any need to risk our lives, our money, or our bodies. Instead we took our ball and left…
And sure enough, we ended up here: a forum that has grown to 10,000 members. A forum that is hated and reviled by all who wish to benefit from our participation. And we’re having none of that shit. Even today, there are monuments to us in the form of mocking and parody forums and blogs- in a vain attempt to shame us from our discussion. How dare we speak openly about such things as sex and women!?
Ian Ironwood refers to the puerarchy as extended adolescence, and in the sense of what adolescence used to be I would agree. But I want to push the definition further- we’re the group of men who have no desire to return back to the way things were. We’ve learned that it is in our nature to be taken advantage of. It’s so well known, it’s a trope: flash some tit and you can get a man to do almost anything.
We’ve taken the reigns. If society provides us nothing of value for our work, then we will spearhead our own happiness. And they don’t like where it’s gonna lead us.
Enjoy the decline.
We’re going to eat pizza. We’re going to play videogames. We’re going to look at porn. We’re going to fuck every bitch we can. And we’re never going to “grow up.” Some of us may make brilliant amounts of money. But one thing’s for sure: what we do is for us- and we’re not going to share. We’ve rejected marriage, we aren’t finishing school, we’re making money for ourselves, and the worst part of all: we’re learning to ignore the narrative of shame – which has been pounding at our door since our inception.
We’re the cultural phenomenon that our media is just catching on to. The statistics show men are dropping out but nobody knows where they’re going.
It just so happens, they’re coming here. We’re the evidence of the puerarchy. We are the puerarchy.
This is not a request; this is not a list of demands. We aren’t a social movement looking for change and cooperation. This is the manifesto of what’s already happening. And there’s nothing that can be done to stop it.
Honor is dead. Long live the Puerarchy.